Looking on the bright side

So, with my lonely nights of late, I've not only had time to gripe about how much I miss Brian and how hard this is; I've also been able to think about how good we have it and how much my little family means to me. Each night before I go to bed (yes, it's still after midnight every night, I'm ashamed to say), I sneak into Samantha's room to watch her sleep for a few minutes. I cover her up and just look at her cute little face, wishing the crib weren't sooo high, so I could kiss her little cheeks. Then I go back to my room and call Brian before going to bed. He sounds exhausted, but always kind and attentive, rarely grumpy or negative even on less sleep per week than I get per night! I wish him a good night, and wish he could be home with me, then say goodbye to him. As I say my prayers before turning out the light, I feel frustrated at first, but then grateful. Very, very grateful.

This may not be the ideal job or the ideal location for us longterm. It definitely has its downside and its rough spots. But it's not all bad. I mean, the pay is great, for one thing. And for now it's what we've got, and it's helping us reach some goals we've set for our future. It's true, I moan and complain about how it's so hard to see Brian work so much and be so tired and miss being home with me and Sam. I don't like being home alone so much, and I don't like seeing how taxing this schedule is to my poor husband! But I also feel very grateful for so many things...

• It's so nice to be able to stay home and be a full-time mom. I love seeing all the little things Samantha is learning and doing. I love how much she loves me and Brian. My mom called her my "little friend" the other day. I like that, because she really is such a fun little person and we are good friends, most of the time (just before nap time, or if I decide to get out the vacuum, we sometimes have to reevaluate our friendship).
• I love how Brian is so good at balancing his priorities and his time; even when the hours are unbearable and we don't see each other very much, I always know Samantha and I are at the top of his list of "most important" things. He does those little things that mean so much... a call when there's two minutes of down time; always a hug and kiss and a prayer in the mornings; and the other night, he even brought home two dark chocolate truffles he saved from his dinner and they were FABULOUS!
• I love our new home. It is so comfy and relaxing. I'm so grateful to have our parking spot right in front of the house, the few stairs we have out front (instead of the bazillion at our old place) and our big back yard with plants and a patio and a little barbeque grill that we've yet to use.
• I'm very grateful for a close group of friends here, who listen and understand and cheer me up with little escapes and escapades when the going is tough. It's so nice to be able to WALK to many of my friends' houses! How very convenient.
• I'm also so glad to be reasonably healthy and fit. I know that's cliche, but it's something I soooo very appreciate and hope I don't take for granted. I'm not saying I couldn't stand to lose that last bit of preggo fat, but I'm feelin' pretty good and satisfied right now, which is a nice way to feel.
• What else, what else? Oh yes, this is a BIG, BIG one... I'm very, very thankful for the phone! On my mission, I earned the nickname Sister Phone. I'll keep it, even though it doesn't rhyme with Bishop. :) We have an internet phone connection that allows me to call the US for free as often as I want. It's sooo nice to talk to my family and friends, most especially my mom. What would I do without the moral telephone support I get?? What a blessing of technology!

I'll stop there, but not for lack of more to say. Actually, I better get busy cleaning my house that I love so much... we have house guests on Friday, and we're going to meet Alicia and Scott and Brielle in Scotland on Saturday. Mucho worko to do-o.

Ciao for now!