Almost Gone

Almost a year and a half ago, Brian came home from Costco one Saturday morning before he started working on more work stuff, as usual. In his little "time off" outing, among other things, he had purchased one of those huge boxes of kitchen garbage bags -- the kind you think you will NEVER EVER run out of, you know? In case you don't know, it looks like this...

I thanked him for being such a thoughtful husband as I found a place for them on the floor of our tiny hall pantry. He smiled and said, "you're welcome," then added, "we're going to be gone from here before those trash bags are gone."

What?? I needed an explanation, so he kindly obliged by repeating, "we're going to be gone from this place, gone from New York, gone on to some different job and different life by the time those trash bags are all gone."

Oh. That. Well, it's good to have goals to work toward, right? In whatever weird way they are measured, I guess?? 

I have been the one pulling out those trash bags, one at a time, three or four bags a week over the past year and a half. And guess what? ... They're almost gone. In fact, the second to last week of July, I opened the box and raised my eyebrows in shock as I saw just how few of those bags were left. It was that same day that Brian and I had a little talk and decided it was time to go. No, not just because our supply of Costco trash bags was dwindling. But still, I took a picture of the few remaining bags later that day, to document the decision to move on... 

And then I cried.

It's true. 

We're moving away from our fun New York adventure.

And it's one of those very happy/sad "mixed feelings" occasions for me.

We're moving back to Idaho, back to our big, lovely home with a garage and fenced back yard and carpet and an ice machine in the freezer. We're headed back to family and friends and familiar things. And we're very excited at what all this means, for our kids, for our parents, for our stability, for Brian's sleep schedule, for our time together as a family. It is definitely a right decision for us for now. Brian will keep working with his company, but his hours will be much better, and we'll see a lot more of each other. It will all be much more predictable and much more manageable, which is what we really need, as a family. It will be a good thing, I know.

But oh, how I will miss here. I have been very happy here, even though it's been rough with Brian's horrendous schedule. I've tried hard to "bloom where I'm planted," and I've found lots to love about my life here. I will miss it, I know. I will miss the ocean and the lakes and the Mighty Hudson. I will miss being close to the city, but not IN the city. I will sooo miss the green, green trees and lush scenery, and the gorgeous huge houses on my running route. I think I will even miss the humidity (eventually, when my lips are chapped and my hands are chapped and bleeding this winter). And mostly I will miss so many wonderful friends. I have become a better person for the people I have met here who have changed my life and enriched me. That sounds kind of cliche and impersonal, I know. But I get too sad when I really start thinking about the dear friends I am leaving here -- and my kids' friends as well. So, I'm trying not to think too much about that part of moving. 

Anyway. This is my announcement post here.

The trash bags are almost gone -- there's one lining the trash can, and one more under the sink right now. And we're soon to follow -- three weeks from today. Wish us luck in yet another chapter!